Tuesday, August 07, 2007

Day 349.2

So, I slept. I told you I would.

One of the Charlie's came along with a bloke who shall be doing some ‘hand holding’ of some description. Amusingly I had seen him at the Biscuit Centre and thought he was cute. Now I cannot think he is cute because he shall see me at my worst, probably, when he tries to get me to do things, like go outside and talk to people. Well, he saw me today - unwashed and bandaged. I think we might get married.

I did tell my mama about the self-harming after all. She was sad. She was also quite loud. People are loud when they are not being miserable – just something I have noticed. And then I slept. And then everyone panicked because I didn't answer the phone.

I thought about doing a lot of things while I lay in my bed (like buying drawer liners to make the newly acquired drawers smell less musty, moving my desk and chucking out an old cupboard), I did none of them. Then, when I woke up at 7.30pm I walked to the local shop to buy tobacco and ice cream.

I don’t think Misery is about today as much as she was yesterday (if at all), it’s quite nice to have some peace from her; she is a pain. I am also less panicky about the bedroom today too, and, small miracles, my bed is no longer upsetting me.

Today, I was also musing (I like that word: musing, musing, musing) about simplicity, thinking that I should become one of those (weird?) people, that have multiples of a few staple items of clothing. You know, like when Batman opens his closet and there are about twenty identical Bat suits hanging up, all in a nice, neat, ordered line? I shall have trousers that are all the same, maybe three pairs; shoes, three pairs and tops, seven. Life would be so much easier like that, no more decisions.

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