Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Day 196

How much of life comes under the "You snooze, you lose" philosophy and how much of life comes down to "fate"?

Example 1: I busted my balls to get a flat, near my friends in the east end of the city. I provided references, I bent over backwards to give the owner everything he wanted - accepting less than I did and I didn't get the flat. He turned me down because I was on benefit. ["You snooze you lose" tactics with a fatalist response?]

Example 2: I called an estate agent this morning to view another flat and didn't tell them I was on benefit in the hope that I could charm my way into it, if I liked it. This is a group viewing, so if an employed (and therefore trustworthy) person likes it, they will get it and I won't? Students are preferred tenants to those on benefit. My income is guaranteed, as a student, we all know, income is not. [Circumstances out with my control - therefore fate?]

Example 3: I have just come back from a really tough counselling session at the Mental Centre and popped into another estate agents, asking to view yet another flat. They said I could go this afternoon at 4.15pm as another prospective tenant was going back for a second viewing. Even though I know that if this guy is interested enough to be going back again that he will probably take it, I postponed until tomorrow so I could get my head straightened out. [Fate, or lazy?]

So, do I believe in fate: in that old adage that "what's for you'll not go by you" or that if I am more pushy and assertive I will get further? The latter doesn't seem to be the case thus far, so maybe I need to be more of a fatalist. And is fate a belief of a predetermined life path and if so, was I destined to be here in this dump of a life, or is believing in fate just an excuse to be lazy?

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